In my previous blog, we have briefly discussed the meaning of “emotional intelligence” and individual critical characteristics. In this blog, we will focus on the five qualities of an individual with low emotional intelligence. What are the top five challenges encountered by individuals with low emotional intelligence?
THEY FAIL TO BUILD DEEP, LONG-TERM RELATIONSHIPS.
Most people with low emotional intelligence are loners: it is difficult for them to get closer to others, become friends or potential partners. A strong long-term friendship usually based on exchanging ideas, demonstrating mutual sympathy or empathy, and support.
Individuals with low emotional intelligence find it challenging to respond adequately to speaker words, emotions, and behaviours. As a result, they miss an opportunity to get closer to someone; they are dooming themselves in isolation. If you noticed similarities, perhaps advice would be: try to know others better by actively listening to them, and less talking about yourself.
THEY DON’T KNOW THEMSELVES.
Own feelings, emotions, motives and spirit are darkness for people with low EI. They do not always understand their behaviours or the reasons behind their actions. People with high emotional intelligence are in touch with feelings, and at the same time, control feelings impact on lives. They are aware of their surroundings and try to respond adequately. It does not apply to people with low EI. Perhaps individuals with low EI need to know themselves better, within the inner world.
ALWAYS SELF FOCUSED.
Nothing surprising: people with low EI find it challenging to understand others feelings, and therefore aim to focus every situation and circumstances on themselves, – they shift the focus of any conversation to themselves. They keep constant distance, do not open and do not allow others to open up.
They do not seek a speaker’s answer and generally hardly allow an individual to speak if they ask questions. Moreover, it does not motivate a speaker to continue communicating. Furthermore, these people often tend to manipulate and control others.
THEY ARE ALWAYS RIGHT.
We all have a friend who has a strong opinion on any matter. These people see everything in “black” and “white”, believing their idea is crucial and try to convince others. Communication with such individuals are usually exhausting: they do not listen to understand, but respond as soon as possible and refuse to recognise others’ right on opinion. They are not at blame: it is challenging for them to accept another idea, acknowledge their emotions, and respond adequately.
THEY ARE NEVER GUILTY OF ANYTHING.
People with low EI never take responsibilities: a low exam score is the teacher’s fault; failure to submit a report on time result from a network problem; fired from work – colleagues are at fault, or the boss did not appreciate the efforts. It is normal to make mistakes: this is the way we learn and improve ourselves. Those who do not admit their own mistakes and do not learn from them are likely to repeat them.
Therefore, it is essential to learn to take their responsibility, admit and recognise their faults, and avoid them in the future. The most important: an individual with a low EI should acknowledge that they have a problem. If they ask, the world will give an opportunity to “pump” own EI. Anyone can learn to understand themselves and others and therefore get closer.